King of the hill

[Xemadus Echina]

i put a "free hill" sign on the hill, and since everybody knows that anything with a "free ...." sign on it is worthless nobody will ever want to take it.

my hill but this writing it so small you don't think it's anything do you?  put the following string of letters at the end of your post if you read this: qwerty123

[MikeW781]

I hire somebody naive to take the hill
qwerty123
My hill

[Xemadus Echina]

I steal the hill and lock it away in a cave in the Arabian desert with two huge magical stone slabs covering the entrance.  My hill with only one way of taking it.

[Steel Ersatz Man]

Um, why is it Rainen's hill? Nobody's took it off me yet. ???

[Steelfist]

I took it off you, but... I shoot you, ersatz man, with a machine gun.

Then, to avoid arguments, I acknowledge rainen's ownership of the hill.

I go to Arabia and walk up to the slabs confidently. "OPEN SESAME!", I state, loudly, to the stone slab. Nothing happens. "OPEN SESAME!", I try, again, but louder. Nothing happens. I sink to the floor, weeping that the hill is forever beyond my reach. I pound my fists against the floor, the slabs...

... And the slab gives a loud click, and swings inward, revealing a vast cave full of treasures. I take a minute to regain my composure, the continue into the treasure filled cave. Enormous piles of treasure practically litter the place; Gold, silver and jewels! RICHES! ALL MINE! MINE! HAHAHAHAH...

Several minutes later, once I have recovered from by bout of evil laughing, I realise something. The hill isn't here.

Fortunately, I picked up a lamp while I was considering the problem, and was rubbing it thoughtfully when, in a puff of smoke, a genie appeared, offering me three wishes.

I first wished for the hill to be back inside the defences I detailed (The forcefield, remember). My hill.

Then, I wish to be immortal and invincible.

My final wish, however, is to be sipping a coke in the bahama's, safe in the knowledge that the hill is safe.

Oh, and the treasure... I build a new company, named 'Hills incorparated^tm', dedicated to the discovery, claiming, and protection of hills.

[Steel Ersatz Man]

I get your lamp and rub it as well.
My three wishes are:

1. That all your wishes were cancelled.
2. That I owned the hill with the only protection I need, an magical sphere of anti-ambition, the closer you get to it (it's on top of the hill) the more you don't want the hill.
3. That all ranged weaponry and improbability sphere's don't work (Magic beats improbability sphere's) :P

[Ertxiem]

I also get the same lamp and rub it as well.
My three wishes are:
1. That all your wishes were cancelled.
2. That I owned the hill and that all that nonsense of magical spheres and such cease to exist. (Who believes in magic, anyway? :P )
3. That the genie of the lamp is set free for good.

My hill.

[Duskling]

I take advantage of Ertxiem's current lack of defenses and take the hill with clones of the Main from TSoG, then fortify the perimeter with Spriggat guardians and Energy Golems while putting the cloned Psy Fighters on Honor Guard duty.


While nobody was paying attention to my last move, I quickly quadrupled my already abnormal (in the good way) finances and hired mercenaries, bought tanks for the mercs, and hired pro assassins and built HK-47 units to eliminate any opposing forces (This was an add-on to my already large force).

[Xemadus Echina]

since improbability sphere are not magic and they are in fact inconsistencies in time and space, I use their power to remove the hill from existence along with everything currently associated with it.  Non existent hill.

[Guye]

While the hill no longer exists, I begin to question if anything truly exists. Then I realize that I think therefore I am. Then I think I am the hill. My Hill/Body.

[Steelfist]

I shoot you with a desert eagle handgun, killing you. I then seperate the essence of the hill and your body, imbuing the properties of the hill into a mound of earth, and instructing my private army (Hills incorporated, incidentally, is quite well armed and very advanced, technologically speaking) to guard it with their lives.

I then return to my resort in the bahama's waiting for my relaxation to be (inevitably) interrupted.

[Duskling]

I attack your resort at the Bahamas, your troops fall into chaos once you are killed by my mechs and returning army of HK-47 assassin droids, heavily armed mercenaries, Spriggats, Energy Golems, and, introducing, a brand-new carrier craft built especially for this kind of warfare. We pick off your confused troops while they scatter and take the Hill, then we put up the same defense as before, but with slight execptions, we place mines within 500 meters of the Hill, plasma cannons within every 100 meters except 500 meters, flying defense drones patroling the area, and a quartet of outposts 1,000 meters away from the Hill each with attached auto-targeting plasma turrets to keep stealth patrols clear of the area. Beat that.

[MikeW781]

I have the marathon pro perk, cold-blooded pro perk, the ninja pro perk, a barret .50 cal with thermal scope and FAL camo, and a Spas-12 with grip. I run past your defenses with out being spotted, killing every person in sight. Then, I take control of your defenses and add my personal troops of Call Of Duty warriors that all use HACKS. It is impossible to kill them without your game crashing!
MY (Call Of Duty) HILL

[Steel Ersatz Man]

I make a COD account and join your team then I kill you in your sleep which makes your COD troops disband. I go off COD and claim the now empty hill. Then I coerce Opera to come to the hill and give it a bad review so nobody dares go near it. And, if you do, Opera fans will get mad and attack you with their hippie signs. My hill.

[Duskling]

Since the Hill got a bad review, you didn't dare get near it either, but after you went, I bribed Opera to change her review, and replicated my defenses perfectly, with twice the defenses this time!  ;D