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King of the hill

Started by Mopman, February 04, 2010, 02:43:06 PM

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Idozen Cair

I quickly grab my tiny little 0.01% bit of the Hill, then run off some secret lair on Mars.  :P
I doesn't care, do I?


I quickly grab it back, and return it to whom it was from whom you stole.

Idozen Cair

I take my pistol can kill you with it. I grab my 0.01% back again and go to some secret lair on Jupiter.
I doesn't care, do I?


I find the secret lair and rescue you from your impending doom; everyone knows that Jupiter is a gas planet, and you were about to be sucking into its core! In your gratitude, you give the .01% back to me.

Idozen Cair

After that, I shoot you with my pistol and killing you (again)
I take back my 0.01% of the Hill, and I defend it with M249 SAW auto-turrets surrounding the bit-Hill.
I doesn't care, do I?


I snipe you right back, tunnel underneath the hill, grab the Hill, and escape.

And you said "take my pistol can kill you with it," not "take my pistol and kill you with it," so I assumed you were merely threatening to.


I make a truimphant return from my journeys throughout reality (And outside it, but I'll keep that up my sleeve for now, thank you). My first act is to announce that a military development scheme is in order. Those automatons are making me nervous.

Steel Ersatz Man

Is Steelfist back?

We are the steel alliance. None shall take our hill!


Not a rebellion, precisely. Merely precaution. When you have an army of automatons and nothing worth using them on . . . well, suffice to say, trigger fingers get itchy. In any case, as always, Steel Ersatz Man, you are welcome to hold the role of trusted second in command.

Hmm . . .

Having considered the possible implications of my own arcane power and the various . . . other abilities . . . which I aquired during my travels I am working to implement magical weapons and defences for soldiers. Duskling, or in Duskling's absence, Steel Erstatz Man, try to work on training the more professional of our troops into an elite cadre for me to outfit with my enhanced equipment.


Will do, boss, implementing elite training rooms, picking out soldiers, and culling the weak starting now.

We may also use some less "humane" methods of... motivation on your command.



The military development.
[spoiler]My research into precognitive and consciousness domination are proceeding well. I trust you will have a cadre of troops prepared to test the 'Projection Apparatus', or, as I prefer to call it, the 'Dominator'. It's effect is thus - the soldier is retrained within a harness inside a capsule. They cannot move their libs or head, but can speak. The machine then allows them to locate a suitable body and possess it, transplating the minds of both parties. When the soldier's objective has been achieved, they can, with a special mental technique, return to their body, then, using specific voice activated commands (In addition to a memory scan to confirm that they are, indeed, the soldier) release themself and make the return switch permanant. There is evidence that this technology can also be used to travel through time, though I have not yet succeeded in this.

In addition, there are special techniques I have unearthed that allow temporary 'body-switching', much the same as the machine - though it takes effort and concentration, and will reverse after some time or if the concentation lapses. This should be taught to the majority of our elites.

However, the main advancement I have made is that of a magically created semi-corporeal form of ammunition: while initially solid (And safe), when fired the increased velocity causes it to rapidly destabilise, drawing in all forms of energy from it's surroundings as it travels and becoming both superheated and non-corporeal. The bullet will resabilise after a varying amount of time - depending on how much energy it can gather. If it is gathering more energy that it is expending, it will quickly become saturated and destabilise completely, releasing all energies destructively. The bullet, after use, disintergrates, so the material cannot be reused. This, in the wrong hands (eg. ours) could be very dangerous.[/spoiler]

Incidentally, some form of mind control or indoctrination may be in order. We wouldn't want these soldiers getting ideas.


I notice that the Steel Empire is going to rise up again I get out my "Special" Maple Syrup and drink some, turning me back into my maple syrup form. I then collect all of my previous weapons from my basement and suit up. A List of Which:


- Night Vision/Thermal Eyes/X-Ray Vision/Ultraviolet Sensors (For eyes)
- A Respiratory System, that gives me oxygen (never runs out)
- A voice box that can change my voice (preset: my voice) includes Translator
- Gravity Boots (allows me to walk up walls and float)
- A Jet Pack (with infinite fuel) coupled with a Set of Wings
- A Shield System (defects mostly everything)
- A Hologram system (Allows me to change how I look [preset:old human body]) and a Cloaking Device (Cannot be detected by thermals)
- A In-Tangible System (Walk Through Most Objects/Shields)
- Auto Healing of Armour, Gear, and Myself
- A Screen that shows all the vital information
- A Time Machine and Dimensional Transporter and Teleporter
- A System that allows me to pick up to 20,000 pounds
- A Communications system (Almost Un-hackable)
- A Source of Food (Infinite)
- Space and Water Equiped
- A Infinite Power Source


- Canadian Hockey Uniform (Un-Penetrable and is able to morph into anything else and make me become cloaked/intangible [hides everything else aswell])
- A Goalies Mask (That Never Breaks, Provides optical information about everything and works a gas mask)
- Hockey Gloves that can increase my Strength allowing me to dig quickly and pick up heavy stuff (up to: 10,000 Kg)
- A Cape (Canadian Flag)
- Skates that can change their from (preset: Skates) (Ability to walk up walls and float)
- A Hockey Stick (Wood, Can't break, and cuts through most substances)
- Hockey Pucks, Different Types: (Explosive, Fire, etc.)
- A Lacrosse Stick (Can't Break, cuts through most substances)
- Lacrosse Balls, Different Types: (Sleep Gas, Smoke, Sticky, Flash, Freeze, etc.)
- A Paddle (Can't Break, cuts through most substances) Can shoot different Materials (Snow, Ice, Water, Maple Syrup, etc.)
- A Backpack that releases Robotic Beavers under my control that can eat through mostly everything (Backpack also plays the Canadian Anthem)
- The Backpack that is a Jetpack and a set of wings
- The Backpack can also transform into a robotic Moose (Car, Plane, Sub, Space-Ship, Dimensional Transporter, Time Machine)
- The Blue Nose: Fastest Sail Boat Ever! (Can't be destroyed, Includes Repair Centre, Only I or Robotic Mountie can control, extra defences)
- The Moose can be also be used to attack people (Lazers, Guns, Antlers, Gases, Etc.)

Robotic Mounties: (50 Currently Active, X Number Created)

- Assortment of different Weapons (Guns, Lazers, Gases, etc.)  
- Un-Hackable or Controlled
- Can survive in any environment
- Cannot not be easily destroyed (parts form back together if destroyed)
- Connected to my Un-hackable Commications
- Able to Teleport/Become Intangible/Become Invisible/Change Appearance/Talk in Every Language
- Can Fly and Walk Up Walls, Jetpack and Wings
- Includes Robotic Horse that has same abilities as Moose
- Infinite Power Source
- Look Like Mounties

Canadian Lair:

- Automatic Base Defences (Gas, Guns, Lazers, Oil, etc.)
- Requires DNA from Myself, Robotic Code, (Plus a password) or Myself Opening it to Enter
- Holds X amount of Mounties
- 99% Indestructible
- Can Fly, Teleport, Turn Invisible, Move, go into Space/Water/Underground, Go Through Time/Dimensions
- Can repair my amour and my gear
- Commications Systems are Stored Here
- Includes Lab and Area for Living and Infinite Food/Maple Syrup Supply
- Can Transform in a Giant Robot, with me controlling robotically or manually
- Almost Un-hackable
- Can Change Form
- Giant Computer Stores all Files, Plans, Can Control Most Technologies with It (Extremely Hard to Hack)
- Infinite Power Source
- Currently Located: Canada, Today[/spoiler]

I switch the cloaking device off of my house and move into my lair, activating 50 of my Mounties. I then use the lair to warp to another timeline where I can live in peace.

I walk downstairs and notice that I have 99 Bottles of Hills on the wall; that contain %1 each from different hill that has ever existed so far. I smile and go upstairs to finally enter the timeline where no one is fighting over the hill and land my lair where my house is. I switch on the cloaking device, disguise myself in my regular clothing and get out another bottle of Maple Syrup to enjoy.
If The World Was A Bit More Like Canada, Then We Would Have A Great World, And Hockey 24/7

- Lord Canada


Boss, a cadre of newly-recruited, full of potential, somewhat weak-minded, and exploitable troops has just been shipped to our research labs. Will begin testing on your command.

Also, I will stop calling you "boss" and use another title, if that is preferable.

Another thing, boss, I strongly advise you to leave our troops enough free thinking to adapt well on the battlefield, as mindless drones do not adapt quickly, if at all.


bugfartboy, using the combined powers of typing in third person context and the power of the letters "smh", magically stays out of the game. :D


Quote from: bugfartboy on December 09, 2011, 10:41:34 PM
bugfartboy, using the combined powers of typing in third person context and the power of the letters "smh", magically stays out of the game. :D



Feel free to call me Steelfist, President, or merely continue with 'boss'. I'm sure your loyalty and competency entitles you to that.

I have developed a form of precognitism. However, visions are erratic and often not useful. Some direction is possible, and I am working on improving the consistency and pertinency of the visions.

Train the soldiers in the use of the projection machines - they will make useful support troops.