Corrupt a Wish Foundation

[bugfartboy]

Granted, You don't eat it and starve.

I wish for telekinesis.

[ArtDrake]

Granted. Sharks like telekinetics.

I wish for xenon.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. But you have no clue what it is or what It does.

I wish for a high score.

[ArtDrake]

Granted. Someone beats it.

I wish other people knew the noble gases of the periodic table:

Helium, Argon, Neon, Krypton, Xenon, Ununoctium.

[Ertxiem]

With granted. Other people knew them, but preferred to quickly forget about them.

I wish Helium was called Helion, in order to have the same termination as the other noble gases.
(Ununoctium doesn't count because it just means 118 and will probably have a new name in the future, hopefully one with the "on" termination.)

[bugfartboy]

Granted, but no one cares but you.

I wish my dog didn't stink.

[Duskling]

Granted, now your cat stinks.

I wish for a Klondike Bar.

[ArtDrake]

Granted, but what would you do for it?

I wish I could turn my Facebook status to "In a relationship." And have it be truthful.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. But five seconds later, it ends.

I wish for insecurity.

[Ertxiem]

Wish granted. Now you are insecure about being insecure and decide to stop being insecure, but you're afraid you fail, so you go to a corner and cry.

I wish I could jump into a cloud and travel to where the wind took me.

[ArtDrake]

You can. The relative wind takes you to the ground at 208 meters/second (the terminal velocity of a human being)

I wish for pie.

[Ertxiem]

Wish granted. You got 8.53973422, approximately, since it's the value of π*e .

I with I was bad at maths.

[ArtDrake]

Granted. I am the only person (or demon prince) left that can do math reliably. I make a fortune.

I wish that people wouldn't make wishes like "I wish", or "I wish my wish wouldn't be corrupted". They're cliché.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. You do, instead being singular insead of plural.

I wish I wouldnt get insecure about trying to be secure.

[ArtDrake]

Granted, but only if you stop talking about security.

I wish for an ornithopter.