King of the hill

[Mopman]

Well, you all know this game, and to start it off, i'll post something easy to beat. I capture the hill, and I have a army of ninjas guarding it. 

                      My Hill

[Steelfist]

I enlist the help of an army of murgos, a group of grolims and some Dagashi (Belgariad). The Dagashi assassinate you, the grolims devastate your army with sorcery and the murgos mop up the survivors. No-one escapes. MY HILL.The Dagashi become my bodyguards and I set the Murgos to guarding my hill, and the grolims become the leaders of the army and protect me and my army from sorcery.

[Mopman]

I come back as a skeleton. I build a space station and teleport the hill into it. I kill you and your army with one blast from my photon cannon. I have an endless army of robots guarding everywhere within a 100 lightyears of my space station. I build an anti teleportation shield.

[Steelfist]

Your space station 'malfunctions' (A computer virus I sent, enjoy) and teleports the hill back down to earth, the blows up, killing you and destroying your army. I then enlist the help of the western kingdoms (Belgariad again) to guard it. And belgarath to protect it from sorcery.

[Kaseke]

I jump ontop of your head, and claim the hill to be my own.

My hill.

[laserpants13]

I send an army of machete-wielding samurais to cut off steelfist's head, causing you to fall off, and him to die. I then station my samurais on guard. My hill.

[Zhampir]

I send an army of immortal ghosts and take over the hill. (hah beat that. [and don't you even think about calling Ghost Busters, I'm warning you XP])

[Kaseke]

I take out a vacoom cleaner and "clean" up the hill. Then I take the hill and move it into a tree. After all this I make a theme park on it, which is named "Dead Cow Zoo"(c).

[cyso]

I hire a bunch of sniper with .50 cals. They shoot a few vital spots of all the attractions in the theme park, causing them to blow up. I then tell them to shoot you, take over the hill, and keep the snipers as guards.

[Kaseke]

I come back as a ghost and mindblast your ghosts to the sun, and then take your heart off your chest. O_O
I then reconstruct the teampark, and make it so it can never been destroyed. As the legal owner of the grounds, I too own the hill.

My hill

[laserpants13]

I hire a crack team of lawyers, who do some digging and discover that the hill is zoned as a residential area only, and you failed to apply for a variance when constructing your theme park. They take you to court, sue the pants off you, and have you evicted from the hill. They then construct a flawless legal defense of the hill.

My hill.

[Kaseke]

I hire my own attorney, who takes your lawyers out, and I get out of the court with 1240973$ inducement payment. I then get my zoo back, and own the hill again.

My hill.

[KZ]

Out you go, kivatti, as you're copyright enfringing here, 'cause "dead cow zoo(c)" was my original idea, which records prove to be true. Hence, the general populace finds out, gets angry, kicks you out and installs me as the rightfull owner of the zoo and the hill.

My hill.

[cyso]

I completely ignore the copyright laws and blow up everything on the hill with a cruise missile.
I then create my own Private Military Corporation and use the hill as a training ground.
All trespassers will be shot. All survivors will be shot again.

[Kaseke]

I teleport the hill to my own universe (here goes again) which no one but I can enter, and live there happily with my hill.

My hill.