Corrupt a Wish Foundation

[ArtDrake]

D-dooh zhadoo, bah-bahhh! It's bugfarboy!

Granted, but you're as miserable as everyone else, because you have to listen to your theme every time you walk into a room.

I wish for slightly less misery upon all existence, because enough people commit suicide as it is. It's quite sad, really.

[Ertxiem]

Wish granted. From now on, people will only mutilate themselves horribly.

I wish I could be 10% more efficient with the things that I have to do using at most 9% more time.

[ArtDrake]

Granted. However, your newfound efficiency leads to lots of downtime that you spend baking cookies, and you become rather chunky.

I wish I had downtime for cookie-baking.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. Sadly, I eat all your cookies and become rather chinky as well. (Corrupt-ception! D: )

I wish for fewer cookies.

[ArtDrake]

D-dooh zhadoo, bah-bahhh! It's bugfarboy!

Granted. There are no more cookies left. Ever.

I wish someone [me] would play that awful entrance theme on the drums and record it, for the benefit of the world.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. Sadly it sounds nothing like we know it should and you follow me into nonexistance in despair.

I wish for $1000 to donate to the TT Kickstarter. I think it'd be interesting to have a villain of my (co)design to appear in the game.

[ArtDrake]

デュデュー、ジャードヴァッパー、ヴァグファーツボイです！

Granted. You have all $1000 dollars you need, but you accidentally squander them on soft drinks.

I wish the Japanese version of the forums hadn't felt the need to translate your entrance theme into Japanese.
[www.sinisterdesign.jp -- check it out!]
[Actually, don't. It doesn't exist.]

[bugfartboy]

Granted. It felt the need to translate it into Yenkahs.

I wish for the pitbull of pity.

[ArtDrake]

Sihyahaaaamba kuchen yeneh kwenkos, sihyahamba kuchen yeneh kwenkos (kwenkos!).

Granted. However, you are promptly attacked by the rottweiler of rot, and develop gangrene.

I wish for your old theme back.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. But you age in the process and are now waaaaaaay past your ducky expiration date. Sorry, but you must leave... Now.

I wish you didn't have to go.

[ArtDrake]

Granted. I don't. However, I ensnare the soul of another innocent duckling and take its body as my own. Expiration date renewed.

I wish for less English homework, because that class is just about pointless. English I taught me everything it's teaching me and more.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. You have less English homework, and instead are required to write an 80 page English paper over the history of punctuation. I would say you fail, but I'd rather not be deterministic.

I wish for faster vehicular acceleration.

[Ertxiem]

D-dooh zhadoo, bah-bahhh! It's bugfartboy!

Wish granted. Squashhhhhed you were (like a bug) against your seat due to the 100g acceleration of your brand new vehicle. You are now as thin as a sheet of paper.

I wish to dance.

[bugfartboy]

Granted. It's the boogie, and you turn into one. Have fun!

I wish for fewer depressed people and more suicidal people.

[ArtDrake]

D-dooh zhadoo, bah-bahhh! It's bugfartboy!

Granted. More people are perfectly happy, yet suicidal for no apparent reason. Good flippin' job.

I wish my friends weren't unhappy.