King of the hill

[Guye]

I  use my undead Stooges in order to infiltrate your lair. Having been poor at Math while alive, the newly zombified stooges care very little for your logical fallacies. Soon most of your forces have been zombified as well (since all zombies seem to have the almost magical ability to catch people in compromising situations, at least until there are so many of them that it doesn't matter anymore). I then use the large number of zombies in order to film a new music video of "Thriller". While you are distracted by this stunning piece of cinematography, I slowly sneak up  on you and kung fu chop you in the back of the neck, incapacitating you almost instantly. My hill.

[Duskling]

I turn your zombies against you by letting them smell you from a distance, they kill you, then I flame them with (what else?) a flamethrower, and claim the Hill with the same shield as last time, only nothing can go through it, except me. Plus I kill rainen.

[Xemadus Echina]

since i'm immortal and outside of the realm of life and death, you can't kill me.  as you see me heal my wounds your head spontaneously implodes as i walk through your "shield" unhindered as i am also outside the realm of space and time.  MY bloody hill.

[Ertxiem]

Well, since you're outside of the realm of space and time, I guess (time) now you're not here on (space) my hill.

[.:Light-God:.]

I revive the dead cow then blow IT up again and IT goes a LOOOONG distance away. My Hill.

[Xemadus Echina]

i contact the guardian of the superluminal sphere and request that he imprisons you in a spacial field that prohibits light and avatars of light from escaping ( thats you since you're a light god ) my hill.

[Guye]

I spend weeks devising an intricate and overcomplicated super secret plan to take the hill using fourteen different assorted lengths of wire, a recording of "Rocketman", and an angry ferret. It takes nearly a fortnight to train the ferret not to eat the assorted lengths of wire, or yelp angrily at the sound of "Rocketman". Unfortunately after training the ferret, it is no longer angry. Realizing the fatal flaw in my super secret plan, I decide to simply take a pistol and shoot Rainen in the head. Then I shoot the ferret. Then I shoot the recording of rocketman. Then I shoot the ferret, again. Then the assorted lengths of wire. Then the ferret one more time, just for good measure. Then I use necromancing to raise the ferret from the great beyond and order it to guard the hill. Lets see you try to get through an undead ferret! My hill.

[Ertxiem]

I walk to the hill and and a conversation of dead to dead. I kindly ask the ferret if he could give me the hill. In exchange, I offer it the location of a plain filled with dead rats and rabbits for it to hunt.
My hill.

[Steelfist]

I was considering how to take the hill off you, but then I realised; none of this has happened yet! So I still own the hill!

My hill (Check my last post for details of the defences).

[Xemadus Echina]

once again i prove that your defenses are meaningless against me as i make them cease to exist by removing the forces that hold their atoms together.  As an after thought I synthesis an element that is deadly to the touch, to all who can't control it, out of the protons neutrons and electrons floating around from your defenses and cover the hill with it. This element causes everything (even a star) to melt away into pure energy after prolonged exposure. (and don't bother saying you can control it because you don't even know what it is. you just know it exists).

[Ertxiem]

After some long seconds (sorry, years) of study, I learn to reverse the force of gravity. With that, I change your hill to a valley just by controlling the gravity from far away from the place previously called "hill". Thus, your weird element didn't affect me at all.
Using the same powers, I change the surroundings to a hill. My hill.

Somehow, all that knowledge is gone after this post... [spoiler]perhaps it's because it's just to easy to get an hill this way.[/spoiler]

[.:Light-God:.]

I summon dragons and wizards to use freeze/flame spells to attack you. Fortunately the flame burns your corpse. My Hill.

[Steelfist]

I get Eriond (A god) to work with his brothers (Also gods) and the prophesy (Could crush a god like an insect), to team up with Belgarath, Beldin, Beltira, Belkira, and Belgarion (All supremely powerful sorcerers), to cause Light-God and his army to turn to dust, and claim the hill. The give it to me, promising to protect it with their powers and deliver retribution to any who claim it off me. My Hill.

Incidentally, Rainen? Since you can't be killed, they can't kill you, but you aren't strong enough to defeat them. Also, the could make life very... Unpleasant, shall we say...

[Guye]

Well unfortunately the gods rarely do anything outside their own self-interest. Upon realization that you have nothing to offer that is worthy of such efforts to beings of their stature they soon desert you. I then bring my undead ferret (who I sat down with and had a heart to heart with about just running off) and command it to feast upon your eyes. While admittedly not very powerful (or fast, considering the multiple gunshot wounds) it does manage to distract long enough for me to put the hill in my pocket and run off. My (apparently miniature) hill. I consider raising an undead army to fend off attackers, but decide it would be too much effort. Instead I merely put on a pair of glasses. After all, no one would attack a man wearing glasses. Right?

[Xemadus Echina]

i myself put my glasses on and then proceed to violently murder you with a pair of chopsticks (because i'm that awesome)  afterwards i manipulate space to return the hill to gargantuan sizes.  My enormous hill